Sharknado 3: Oh Hell No!

PLOT (spoiler alert!!!):

While sharknado fighter Fin Shepard is in Washington, D.C. to receive a medal of honor from the president, another sharknado strikes, devastating the nation’s capital. Fin and the president work together to defeat the sharks, and the storm unexpectedly subsides. Fearing that April, who is at Universal Orlando with their daughter Claudia and her mother May, is in danger, Fin heads for Florida. On his way there, he encounters a “fognado”, which is stopped by Nova Clarke, his former employee from the first film who has become a hardened sharknado storm tracker, and her partner Lucas Stevens. They stop at a military airport where they get clearance to use a fighter jet to bomb other forming sharknados. Lucas sacrifices himself to blow up a sharknado so Nova and Fin can escape. They detonate a bomb in a sharknado over the Daytona 500 race. After crash landing in Orlando they reunite with April, Claudia and May who have survived the sharknado that has hit the theme park. Realizing that the numerous storms will soon combine into a massive “sharkicane” that will destroy the entire East Coast, Fin calls in a favor from his estranged father, former NASA colonel Gil Shepard, for a risky plan to destroy the storm from space.

Gil, Fin, April, and Nova reach Cape Canaveral and where they plan to use a top-secret Space Shuttle to blow up tanks of rocket fuel into the storm. While Nova clears a path, Gil, Fin and April launch into space where they detonate the external tank, but it fails to stop the wall of sharknados. Gil deploys “Plan B”, activating a Reagan-era Strategic Defense Initiative satellite laser weapon. This time, the sharknados are destroyed, but the beam causes the sharks to propel into space, attacking the shuttle. Fin fights them off using an energy-beam chainsaw; he and April are eaten by two separate sharks which fall back down to Earth. Though the sharks are charred from atmospheric entry, Fin emerges from his shark and discovers that April has too along with their newborn. As the family and Nova reunite, Fin names his newborn son after his father, who has landed on the moon. April is about to recover Fin’s father’s badge when a Shuttle fragment is about to hit her.

REVIEW:

Am I the only one who is a little surprised that these Sharknado movies have made it all the way into a trilogy? Here we are with Sharknado 3: Oh Hell No!, and one must wonder if this is the end for this franchise, will it keep going, or are we in for a reboot/remake in the next few years. Only time will tell, but for now, let’s see what this is lik, shall we?

What is this about?

Toothy terror bursts from the ocean once more in this third installment of the epic Sharknado story. After devastating Washington, D.C., the airborne shark vortex heads for Orlando, Fla., and its jam-packed theme parks

What did I like?

10. In a rather small part, Bo Derek plays Tara Reid’s mother. This is going to sound a bit mean, but there are some scenes where it looks as if they are sisters or Reid is the mother. Isn’t it amazing what plastic surgery can do, for better or worse? Seriously, though, Derek still looks great and I can mostly buy her as Reid’s mother, so kudos for getting that bit of casting correct.

Better effects. I’ll admit it, these sharks are starting to look a little bit more realistic, as opposed to the Dollar store toys they obviously had been using as models before. Syfy gets some heavy flack for the quality of effects in its films, so perhaps this is them turning the corner…or maybe it is just a few extra $$$ to afford better effects. Whatever the case, I am glad to see them working to improve the product, rather than leaving is stagnant.

Only one place left to go. First, these sharknadoes hit Los Angeles, then they hit New York. Just like with alien invasions, you know once you take out those mega cities, there isn’t much else to do, unless you want to hit Washington, overseas, or just rum amok is space. It appears that if this franchise is going to continue, it will be doing so in space, because that is where the sharks are now. I can’t see a problem with that, actually. This is a franchise that has never taken itself seriously, and by going out in space, the absurdity can continue at an even larger scale!

What didn’t I like?

Too much of a hero. I noticed something going with this film, it tries to have some depth. For instance, on more than one occasion, it is brought up that Fin, Ian Ziering’s character, always has to be the hero. It also is mentioned that the sharks seems to follow him and that only he and his family escape alive. Something that probably should be explored at some point. There was also mention of the sharks being a sign of the apocalypse, but I think that was just a passing mention, rather than a subplot that never went anywhere. Judging by the trailer I just watched for the next film, yes there is going to be a Sharknado 4, it looks like someone else might just get to be the hero.

Out of the water. After crashing a plane, Ian Ziering and Cassie Scerbo (returning from Sharknado) emerge from the water in their swimsuits. Don’t ask me how it is that they managed to not have a scratch on them, and yet their clothes were torn to reveal conveniently hidden swimsuits. Obviously, this was an homage to those James Bond movies where our hero or the girl emerges from the water, but it does make one scratch their head. It just seems so out of place, even for this film!

President. Basketball fans, and the 2 or 3 people out there that are somehow keeping Shark Tank on the air, will know who Mark Cuban is. To me, I can’t see him as the president (yet, I’d pay to have him over the two that are running right now). He just doesn’t seem to fit the bill. I know this is only a movie, but if you look at everyone else that played the president of the US on film, be it fact or fictional character, they look the part. Cuban doesn’t and on top of that, he doesn’t portray leadership to me. I suppose his passion is what won him the vote.

Final verdict on Sharknado 3: Oh Hell No! Well, I can see that there was some effort put into this, but that is about it. For the life od me, I couldn’t figure out what the biggest draw here is. Other than David Hasslehoff, no one is a household name. The next biggest star is Chris Jericho! All of this is to say that people still wish to see this flick. Do I recommend it? No, but if it pops up in a Saturday afternoon when you’re flipping through channels, it won’t be the worst thing to cross the airwaves.

3 out of 5 stars

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: